


A Mission for a Goose

by Quin



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game), Untitled Goose Game (Video Game)
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Humor, Teamwork, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 02:07:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21779791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quin/pseuds/Quin
Summary: When sales aren’t going well at Pierre’s general store, Abigail has an idea how to help – it involves a horrible goose.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 44
Collections: Yuletide 2019





	A Mission for a Goose

**Author's Note:**

  * For [krionachen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/krionachen/gifts).



> Thanks to Karios for the beta.

“This is my store and that means I am the one who decides how to run it!”

Abigail slumped down on the chair next to her video game console. Her parents were having that argument again. She had lost count of how many times she had already heard it. Even if she didn’t want to listen in, the walls were thin enough that she could keep track of every word being yelled.

“I am your wife and I don’t want to be left out of this decision. I say we need to take the deal Morris has offered us.”

Abigail understood that it was difficult to keep earning money with the competition that was JojaMart, but her parents’ discussion always went in circles. 

She rolled her eyes as she spoke along with her father: “I am not going to outsource my crop sales. Then I'd have even less to offer to our customers.”

Actually, Abigail had planned to leave her room to go to the Stardrop Saloon, but now she decided to stay put. She didn’t want to get involved in her parents’ bickering.

“Pierre, you say every day that you just need one good sales day to pay our loan off, but I don’t see it happening. When will you come to your senses?”

Abigail stood up and moved her chair, so it faced the TV screen. She turned the gaming console on. She needed a distraction. She had already beat _Journey of the Prairie King_ together with Nelly when the farmer had been to her place the other day. It was time to purchase a new game. Maybe there would even be an interesting title on sale today?

Trying to block out her parents’ voices while she browsed all the new content available, Abigail came to halt almost at the end of the alphabetical list. She moved the cursor to _Untitled Goose Game._ Now that sounded like a game fitting for a farmer, too, if Nelly wanted to join her for another gaming session in the future.

Abigail clicked the purchase button, waited for the download to finish and pressed start. For the next few hours Abigail cackled as her horrible goose wildly flapped its wings, scared random villagers with their mighty honk and wreaked havoc in that not-so-idyllic-anymore small town.

She only realised how much time had gone by when her stomach started to rumble. As she put the controller down, Abigail noticed that the house was calm. Her father was probably in the store and her mother out talking to the neighbours. Relieved, she let out a small breath.

Now, she could go to the kitchen and fix herself a small snack, she could eat at the saloon, or she could go to the farm and meet up with Nelly. Abigail had been to the farm before, but come to think of it, she hadn’t seen a goose in Nelly’s coop. Well, as far as she knew, Marnie didn’t sell any geese. And if they behaved similar to the way the game had led Abigail to believe, she understood why.

She chuckled to herself as she imagined a goose set loose in Pelican Town (turning it into Goose Town), messing up Mayor Lewis’ carefully structured flower bed, stealing Dusty’s dog food, running away with Harvey’s glasses and pulling down the items stocked on the store’s shelves.

Abigail shook her head at her last image. No, it wouldn’t be good if the goose drove the few customers they had away from shopping. 

A devilish smile crept on Abigail’s lips as an idea suddenly formed in her head. But what if…? Oh yes, that would be terrific, and it could solve her parents’ problem if done right.

She jumped up and rushed out of the house. Time to talk with Nelly as Nelly was closer to Marnie. Besides, if Nelly asked the rancher for help, it wouldn’t look as suspicious as if Abigail requested it herself. 

+++

It had only been a few days, but it still felt like an eternity to Abigail. She paced around nervously as she waited for Sam to arrive at her house. She, Nelly, Sam, and Sebastian had thoroughly discussed their plan, so that everyone would have an alibi. Nevertheless, there were enough things that might still go awry.

Nelly and Sebastian would play pool at the Stardrop Saloon on the night the special delivery came into Marnie’s Ranch. Meanwhile, Abigail’s parents would witness Sam coming to her room to discuss their _band plans._ And when her father and mother probably would have another argument, she and Sam could sneak out to _steal_ the delivery Nelly requested and place it somewhere else.

Breathe, Abby, breathe, she told herself as Sam finally knocked on the front door.

“Good evening, Caroline, Pierre. How are you doing?” Sam greeted Abigail’s parents as he entered the living room. “How’s the store?”

As her father’s expression slightly darkened, Sam quickly backtracked. “Sorry, that was a stupid question what with me working for JojaMart. Please don’t mind me; I am here to see Abby. We're brainstorming for new songs.” 

Abigail quickly ushered Sam into her room. She gave him a thumbs up as she heard her mother raise her voice. She felt a tinge of guilt for having Sam ignite her parents’ next disagreement. In the end, however, it was all for the greater good.

“Are you still fine with this?” she asked Sam. “I mean, you are working for JojaMart, after all.”

Sam shrugged. “It’s just a part-time job until my father has settled in again. It doesn’t mean anything to me. Besides, our plan will only take one day. And it’s the best alibi, isn’t it? Why would I want to harm my own workplace?”

He smirked at her as he conjured up a grain sack from behind his back. “Sebastian gave me this. I reckon the most difficult part will be transporting the delivery from the ranch to JojaMart. Even though Pelican Town isn’t that large, keeping the struggling package contained could draw unwanted attention to us.”

“Nelly and I discussed this while playing video games. We came up with a better idea, I believe.” Abigail pointed towards two fishing poles that leant against one of the walls. “We can use these as bait and to guide it.”

Sam nodded. “Okay, I hope this will work. You plan to attach a set of keys to one rod and maybe a toy to the other one?”

“Exactly. I also have some lettuce heads ready as a bribe, so hopefully our little helper will be on our side from the get go.” Abigail picked up the aforementioned items and put them in Sam’s grain sack. “Come on, let’s go while my parents are distracted.”

Thank Yoba, she and Sam made it to Marnie’s Ranch without encountering any of the other villagers.

“What’s our next step?” Sam asked Abigail as they stood in the barn’s shadow.

Abigail scratched her head. “Jas is asleep and I bet Shane is already at the saloon. We will wait until Marnie leaves, too. Nelly has scouted out the place – I mean she is a frequent customer. She drew a map for me. Just follow my lead.”

It was likely merely a few minutes before Marnie stepped out of the door and went on her way, but once more it seemed like ages passed until Abigail and Sam could enter the barn unobserved.

Inside, it was quite dark and it reeked of hay and cow’s dung. Abigail had to sneeze. Hopefully, none of the animals would cause an upheaval. They were strangers after all. Though Nelly had told her that the most important thing was to stay calm. Just as a normal farmer would do.

Nevertheless, Abigail’s eyes had a hard time adjusting.

“What’s wrong?” Sam whispered. “Why aren’t you moving?”

Abigail sighed. “It’s more difficult than I expected. I can’t see our delivery.”

Something honked behind her and Abigail jumped only to realise that the sound had been coming from Sam.

“What was that for? Man, you scared me. And we don’t want to startle the cows and pigs in here,” Abigail scolded him.

Just then, an even louder honk resonated off the walls. The cows mooed loudly in return. Abigail grabbed Sam’s arm hard. Her ears rang.

“That wasn’t me,” he protested. “But it was answering my mating call.”

Abigail huffed. “Fine, whatever. Let’s get our feathery friend out of here quickly before someone notices us after all.”

Finally, her eyes had gotten used to the dim light in the barn, so Abigail could also visually locate the source of the honking.

The goose sat in a small extra compartment, giving Abigail and Sam a curious look as they approached. If the gloomy surroundings weren’t deceiving her, Abigail thought she saw an intelligent, mischievous sparkle in the goose's dark eyes. She took out the heads of lettuce from the grain sack. The goose appreciatively flapped its wings as she and Sam took turns in feeding it.

“I name you Feathers,” Sam said as the goose swallowed the last bite. “It’s a good name, isn’t it?”

Abigail didn’t have the chance to reply as the large bird either honked approvingly at its new name or maybe it was honking its disapproval at the food supply having stopped. Abigail groaned inwardly. She should have brought ear plugs. Why hadn’t she thought of ear plugs? The greater good, stay focussed, she reminded herself.

Sam also rubbed his ears as if in slight pain.

“I hate to repeat myself, but we need to get going,” Abigail insisted as she handed Sam one of the fishing rods which now had a toy boat attached as bait.

Feathers perked up as Abigail unfastened the latch on the stall it was in, making way for the goose’s freedom.

“Now Sam, keep Feathers moving.”

The goose was faster than either Sam or Abigail expected and it pecked Sam in the butt.

“Ouch.” Sam yelped. “Abby, please help.”

Abigail quickly snatched up her own fishing pole and a set of keys clinked against each other. Feathers turned around, its head surging forward and Abigail dashed towards the barn’s door. She was glad she wasn’t doing this alone.

It took a real team effort to get Feathers outside and on track to Pelican Town’s entrance.

All was going well until the goose lost interest in both the toy boat and the keys. For an animal that waddled on two legs, it was surprisingly fast. Feathers bolted towards the trash can in front of Sam’s house.

Bang! The can toppled over and fell to the ground. Its contents spilled on the ground.

“Who’s there?” Jody’s voice rang out from within the house.

“Mum, racoons sneaked into our trash can, but I chased them away. I will clean everything up. No need to worry,” Sam called out, appeasing his mother.

Phew, Abigail wiped some sweat from her forehead as Jody stayed inside, seemingly having swallowed her son’s white lie. 

In the meantime, Feather had dragged an old boot out of the trash pile and proudly carried it in its beak. Abigail chased after the goose, trying to catch the shoe with her fishing rod. She had forgotten about her keys though. One more swing and the end of the pole with said set of keys got stuck in the branches of one of the oaks trees in the graveyard. 

Abigail tried to untangle the fishing rod, but gave up after the third try. She shouldn’t let Feathers out of sight. Hurrying after the goose, she hoped Sam would catch up soon, or they would never make it to JojaMart in peace.

“Wait for me, Feathers,” Abigail demanded, albeit knowing that the stubborn animal wouldn’t listen to her. Without a backwards glance, the goose dropped the boot in front of Mayor Lewis’ gate – where undoubtedly Lewis would trip over it in the morning – and continued on its path probably to plot more mischief. 

Abigail decided that the stupid shoe could wait (of course, she wouldn’t forget about it, would she?) and hurried after Feathers. 

“Sam, where are you? We can’t let Feathers get into the museum. I don’t want to invoke Gunther’s wrath if Feathers messes up the collections and the books.”

Coughing, Sam caught up with her. “Coming, coming,” he wheezed, struggling for air.

Feathers was still a couple of metres ahead of them, namely in front of Clint’s blacksmith shop.

At that moment, Abigail thought she perhaps should have worked out more instead of hanging in front of her gaming console. Although she ran at full speed and leapt forward, she couldn’t close the distance in time.

Tugging at the handle of the smith’s shovel with full force, Feathers showed off all its muscles in their fowl glory. At last, the shovel surrendered by falling to the ground and breaking into two pieces. Then, as if nothing in the world had happened, the goose peacefully waddled past the smithy. 

In all honesty, Abigail had to admit that the _Untitled Goose Game_ hadn’t exaggerated the devilry of geese. All she could hope for was that Feathers hadn’t given the town its all yet – ultimately tomorrow was the most important day.

Abigail shot Sam a look, and then motioned towards the goose. “Make sure it reaches JojaMart without further incident. I’ll try to repair Clint’s shovel.”

She was glad she always had a roll of duct tape in her pockets. Abigail acted according to the motto: the more the merrier as she taped the pole to the shovel. The result wouldn’t win her any design prizes – Clint would definitely notice – nonetheless the shovel should be usable again.

Hoping that the smith wouldn’t come back from the Stardrop Saloon at this moment, Abigail placed the tool back against the wall. She would worry about Clint’s reaction later.

Abigail broke out into another sprint. The finish line was within her reach. Panting, she reached Sam right in front of JojaMart. The goose was nowhere to be seen. It was suspiciously silent. 

“Sam, where’s Feathers?” Abigail inquired incredulously. 

Sam shrugged, abashed. “Our goose friend was right behind me a moment ago. I was just checking if Sebastian had remotely disabled the security cameras as he promised us.”

“And?”

“Well, he did. We can bring Feathers inside now. Feathers, Feathers, come back to mommy and daddy,” Sam yelled at the top of his lungs.

Abigail smacked her forehead. “Sam, please shut up. You’re going to draw unwanted attention to us.”

“But we need our baby to return to make your plan work, right?” Sam shot her a grin.

Abigail snorted. “I thought you were his mate. Why don’t you try your goose mating call on it?” 

“Great idea, Abby.” Sam formed a funnel in front of his mouth and honked loudly.

“That was sarcasm,” Abigail was about to answer, but her reply was swallowed by a honk that seemed to be tenfold louder. She quickly covered her ears. Feathers trudged around the corner, wings flapping excitedly as the goose spotted Sam.

Sam clapped his hands, delighted. “We are a good team. No, we are a brilliant team. Feathers, what do you think? Enough action for today? How about you get in this nice crate belonging to the nice delivery Morris is going to open tomorrow in the mart?”

To Abigail’s astonishment, Feathers behaved as if someone had replaced the goose with something else – a robot, maybe? Sam had no trouble ushering Feathers inside and closing the crate after ensuring the goose had enough air to breathe and some water for drinking. 

“I am a goose whisperer,” Sam waved his hands as if he was the greatest animal tamer to have ever lived in the Ferngill Republic.

“Yes, yes, yes.” Abigail chose to purposefully ignore Sam’s further ramblings. Whether she wanted or didn’t want to acknowledge that Sam could handle Feathers better than she could, they should move on.

Abigail nudged Sam. “Home?”

“Roger that,” Sam saluted her. “Don’t forget to turn your computer on first thing in the morning.”

“I couldn't possibly forget it. I mean, not after Sebastian and I spent ages on setting up the connection between my computer and your equipment, making sure that transmission and recording works.”

Sam shoved his hands into his pockets as they made their way back. “Good, good. So tomorrow I will be in the JojaMart, you in front of your pc and Nelly and Sebastian will ensure that Feathers will safely get to her farm, so that Morris doesn’t get her hands on our goose once the deed is accomplished.”

“Yeah, I am still a bit nervous though.” Abigail admitted.

Sam sent her an encouraging smile. “I believe in our mission; it won’t fail. Hope you sleep well. See you tomorrow.”

“If you say so.” Sam’s good mood was infectious as always. Abigail smiled back. “Sleep well, too. Good night, Sam.”

+++

Although she had to get back into her house via climbing through the window, Abigail slept surprisingly well. So well, she had almost overslept her alarm clock. At least, her mother hadn’t stormed into her room and demanded that she get up to join her and her father at the breakfast table. It was one of the few things her mum had given up on.

She could eat breakfast later. Abigail didn’t bother changing into everyday clothes. She quickly turned her computer on. She opened a half-finished essay, so she could always pretend she was doing her homework in case one of her parents came in. Next, she pressed the “connect and record” button on her desktop, praying that it would work. 

After a few seconds a second window popped up, but the screen was all black. Abigail twiddled her thumbs in anticipation. Then without further warning, a massive honk almost fried her loudspeakers. Hastily, Abigail turned down the volume. Finally, the video feed came to life in vibrant colour.

The camera was a bit shaky, the first thing Abigail could see were just shelves of Joja Cola. After a while, more of the supermarket came into view as well as a thumbs up as Sam seemed to have gotten a grip on how he should position himself for the best recording possible.

Praise the newest technology and Sebastian’s tech-savviness, the tiny camera in the collar of Sam’s working uniform couldn’t be detected if you didn’t know it was there.

Abigail squealed in delight as Sam eventually managed to get a shot of Feathers. Currently, the goose had its beak in the sales display, taking out one item after another and tossing them to the ground. Soon, it was snowing prettily and the floor was covered in burst flour bags. By the half-hearted swing of a broom in front of the camera, Abigail was able to tell Sam was really into cleaning up this mess. Not. She giggled.

It seemed Morris had advised the cashier to chase after Feathers. Right after she had left the register, the goose led her on a chase around the aisles. It used a shortcut by running under the lowest shelf, sending the Grass Starters on it flying as Feathers grazed the wooden boards. 

Before the cashier could get her hands on the goose, Feathers was back at the register, making it ring out with a happy tune as the goose pecked in several numbers. Abigail felt a bit sorry for the person who had to sort this out, but then remembering it was very likely to be Morris, she immediately discarded her feelings.

After Feathers had played with the register to its satisfaction, the goose turned its attention to the shopping baskets. It hopped onto a pile of them, trying to reach the goods that were stacked up on the upper parts of the shelves. Sam successfully zoomed on that part of the JojaMart, anticipating Feathers to strike again. Lo and behold, the goose was blissfully picking into the seed bags, very much enjoying its breakfast.

Morris was screaming at everyone, at Feathers, the cashier, and at Sam in his best ‘I am the manager – obey me!’ voice, but it was no use. The cashier was occupied with another customer – Abigail thought it might be Pam – trying to gather her shopping which were sprawled all over the aisles as a result of Feathers causing some strong gusts of air by flapping its wings. 

And Sam, of course, Sam was secretly cheering the goose on. The computer screen became almost blurry as Abigail wiped tears of laughter from her eyes. She held her sides as she observed Morris trying to go after Feathers. He tripped over one of the shopping baskets, stumbling forwards in a futile attempt to shoo the goose away from the seeds. Feathers just turned around and nicked Morris’ glasses off his face, flying away to another section afterwards while honking in triumph.

Without being able to see much, Morris completely lost his sense of direction. He got his foot entangled in a sweets display near the register. Candy upon candy rained down on him. Cursing, Morris got to his feet again, and ran straight forward to the supermarket’s exit.

Abigail’s tummy was still hurting and she was struggling hard not to fall from her own chair when the transmission ended. She wanted to stop laughing, but every time she thought she had herself under control, she ended up bursting into laughter again.

Without warning, the door to her room opened. Her mum was there, throwing her a bewildered look.

“What are you doing there, child? Hurry up, we have a sudden influx of customers; your father needs your help!”

Abigail rubbed her hands. Mission accomplished. She was already looking forward to a reunion with Sam, Nelly, Sebastian, and of course, Feathers. They would hang out at the farm, eat pizza, rewatch the video and honk a lot.


End file.
